


I'm Sorry

by FFanon



Series: Can't Get Enough [23]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Apologies, Best Friends, Established Relationship, F/M, False Accusations, Fluff and Angst, Relationship Problems, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 09:42:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26849872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FFanon/pseuds/FFanon
Summary: Rick and Lori's problems reach a new level that leads to Rachel and Shane having their first fight.
Relationships: Shane Walsh/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Can't Get Enough [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1284716
Comments: 12
Kudos: 38





	I'm Sorry

After a shared shower, the two of them ended up cuddling on the couch and finally starting that new show on Netflix they'd been meaning to see. During an episode and a half Shane had moved to his back with Rachel laying on top of him. With him in only a pair of lounge pants and her in only a t-shirt, she kept her legs sandwiched between his as best she could while settling her head by his neck. 

Delilah had settled on the floor, right by the bottom of the couch. Shane had one arm hanging down, running his hand back and forth along Dee's side and one arm around Rachel, his hand keeping a firm, but gentle grip on her butt to keep her steady. 

Rachel's breathing was slow, but he felt her hand bury under his shoulder.

"Sleepin'?" he looked down his nose at the top of her head.

She nuzzled her nose against his neck a little more. In a small, weak voice he hears, "No."

A soft grin as he presses his mouth to her hair, "No, huh? So, you wouldn't mind if I got up to grab a beer?" a light kiss pressed to her head.

"No, don't move," she weakly whines, her palm fitting sweetly to his jaw but her head never moving. He turns his head to kiss her palm before sliding his hand up to her back to give a few rubs.

"I'm just resting my eyes," she explains horribly. 

"Ohhh, so that's it?" he smirks.

"Mmm."

"You know I could always just bring you to bed if you want."

"We're watching something."

This time he can't help it, he chuckles which shakes Rachel some, " _I'm_ watchin' somethin’. _You're_ sleepin'."

"How could I with you talking?" she mumbles and now he's laughing harder which jostles her enough to finally look at him. But the situation has a tired smile on her face, "Babe!" she scolds.

Shane brings a hand to the back of her head as he tries to control his laughter, "You're funny, ain't my fault."

Just then the doorbell sounds and both of them crane their necks to look toward the front door, then the clock on the TV.

11:35pm.

Rachel moves herself from him and sits up at the end of the couch as Delilah gets herself up too, barking a couple times.

Shane gives his girlfriend a quizzical look before standing up and sticking his hand out to the side, as if telling her to stay back, as he moves slowly to the door.

Stepping back from looking through the peephole, he informs her, "It's Rick," before grabbing the doorknob.

She's quick to remember she has no pants on and yanks the large throw off the back of the couch, pulling it over her lower half. Delilah sits on the floor, close to Rachel, her tail sweeping the area rug as it wags. Rachel pets the top of Dee's head

Shane opens the door to his best friend who's holding a duffel bag, his face oddly emotionless. As soon as Shane hears Rick's voice, the way he sounds almost lost, his brows furrow at what could be going on.

"I, uh, I should have figured Rachel would be here. I'm sorry. But, uh, Lori, she just kicked me out?" the last part said with lingering disbelief.

"Shit. Come in, man," Shane steps aside as he opens the door more. Rachel heard what was said and she herself is surprised at the turn of events. Sure, Lori complained about Rick at lunch, but there was no indication that this was where her head was at.

Delilah, the always loving girl, makes her way over to their guest who understandably ignores her at the moment. Rachel stands up, wrapping the blanket around her shoulders to keep it around her body. As Rick turns away to walk towards the loveseat, Shane shoots her a questioning look about the blanket. 

She quickly opens it enough to let him see and pointedly looks down before closing it. His eyes widen for a second at the understanding and he mouths 'Sorry' to her. She gives a quick shake of her head to mean it's fine and she makes her way to his bedroom. 

As Delilah follows her owner, Shane takes a seat on the couch, leaning his arms on his knees, "What happened?"

Rick glances at Rachel leaving the room and looks back to his best friend, "I don't even know. We got into it again, the usual shit. Except this time she told me to leave. Just like that. 'Leave, Rick, just go!' I pushed her on it. Asked why. Said she needed some time."

Rachel quietly makes her way back to the living room, now with leggings on and one of Shane's sweatshirts to mask the fact she doesn't have a bra on. She takes a seat next to Shane, tucking a leg underneath her. 

Rick continues, "I asked her why and she said she needed time to think...about us. What the hell does that even mean?" he drops his face to his hands.

Shane and her share a look before Rick raises his head and looks at Rachel.

"Did she say anything yesterday? Something that would make me understand this. Did _you_ say something? You were the only one who saw her yesterday."

It's not entirely cruel the way he asks, but it's also not completely innocent. She's surprised enough by it that she feels like she freezes. But Shane sensed the tone too and he sits up straighter, looking at Rick with annoyance, "Hey, what are you doin’?" he questions him with a simmering anger.

But Rick doesn't budge, "I'm just wondering if I missed something and since she just saw Lori, I wanna know if something was said."

Shane answers for Rachel again, or tries to, "You really think she'd -"

But Rachel puts her hand on his arm to stop him and answers for herself, "Rick, I promise you, I'm as surprised as you are. I would never say anything to suggest she do this. Never."

Bless her pup, because Delilah scratches at the back door and Rachel all but jumps up to take care of her, "Excuse me."

Shane keeps his attention on Rick, but watches out of his peripheral as Rachel steps outside with Delilah. Once she does, he looks at Rick, "I love you, man, I do and you know you're more than welcome to stay here, but you don't get to talk to her like that. You understand me?”

“My wife just kicked me out of my home. Away from my son! If she knows something, I deserve to know, Shane. The only thing that’s changed from yesterday to today is that she spoke to Lori.”

“I get that you’re angry, that you’re upset, confused, all of it, but it doesn’t give you the right to accuse her of some bullshit. You may not know her like I do yet, but you know her enough. Whatever you’re thinkin’ she had a part in, you’re dead wrong. Hear me? So back off,” Shane warns.

The back door slides open and the two men break eye contact to glance at Rachel and Delilah walk back inside. Shane tries to change the tone of the conversation to keep her in the dark.

“You know I only got the couch for ya,” he reminds Rick as he stands up. Rachel keeps walking through the living room and out of sight around the corner.

“Yeah,” is all he answers with, “I appreciate it all the same.”

“Let me get ya a couple blankets,” Shane heads down the hall to the closet and grabs the extra bedspread he has. He decides last minute to grab a pair of sheets too. He has a couple more blankets in one of the laundry room cabinets so he heads there next.

Putting down his growing pile on the counter space in there, he grabs the extra blanket as Rachel follows him inside, closing the door. 

With a hushed voice, “I swear I never said anything to Lori about this.”

He can’t believe she even feels the need to tell him that, “I know you didn’t. Rick’s fucked up right now and was an asshole, don’t let him get to you.”

She gives him a slow nod before running a hand through her hair, “I really think it’s best if me and Dee go home.”

“What? Why?” 

“Your best friend is having an awful night. He needs you. And having your girlfriend around is probably the last thing he wants, especially if he’s blaming me for this.”

“He can leave if he has a problem with you bein’ here, then. I love the man, but I love you, too,” and to try to ease her apprehension with humor, he adds, “Plus, you were here first.”

But all it gets him is a weak smirk as she runs a hand through her hair.

Realizing she’s taking this more serious than he even thought, he touches her forearm, “Hey, I’m settin’ him up on the couch and then that’s it. It’s just you and me after that.”

But she just looks at him, obviously thinking over his words.

Shane softly presses on, “I want you to stay.”

With hesitancy, she nods, “Okay.”

When he pulls her into his arms, she goes willingly, hugging his body. Shane sets a comforting hand to the back of her head and kisses her temple before moving both arms around her frame. 

“You’re also my best friend.”

Rachel lifts her head to look at him, so he continues, “You said Rick’s my best friend, but so are you. You’re just as important to me.”

There’s the smile he was hoping to get before. She tenderly cups his jaw and kisses him, “You’re mine, too,” she quietly shares against his lips.

He kisses her with a smile, letting his hands rub her sides before leaving them at her hips. He leaves her with a kiss to her forehead when she pulls away, then she’s leaving the laundry room to head to his bedroom.

As it turns out, after setting the couch up, Rick ends up talking a bit to Shane about it all. Though Shane notices that Rick makes an effort to leave Rachel’s name out of his mouth, he still catches the man insinuating again that she may have given Lori the idea. Shane bites his tongue, not wanting to go at his friend for a second time, especially with the shit he’s already dealing with, but it’s hard. Finally, with both of them needing to work in the morning, Shane manages to put a pause on the conversation and they both agree to sleep for now. 

Shane calls for Delilah to follow him, which she does, and they both head down the hall into the bedroom. To give privacy to everyone, Shane shuts his bedroom door, with Delilah staying with them all night instead of having free reign of the house. 

Rachel’s sitting cross legged, back against the headboard, her phone in her hand as her fingers move along the screen.

“What’s up?” he asks.

Without looking up, “I’m trying to work out a text to Lori. If Rick thinks it was me, she probably does too and is probably equally mad at me.”

“Sweetheart,” he shakes his head and sits down next to her, “It’s late and I highly doubt Lori is mad at you,” he takes the phone from her hands and puts it next to his on the bedside table.

“Who would think Rick would be mad at me?” she counters.

“His world is upside down right now. He’s not thinkin’ straight.”

“He seemed pretty intent on that point.”

“He’s lookin’ for someone to blame is all, but I am sorry that he’s choosin’ you for that.”

But her quiet, “...yeah,” doesn’t make him feel any better about it.

Shane rubs her leg, “Come on, let’s go to sleep. Let the shock wear off on him and tomorrow will be better.”

* * *

The alarm on his phone brings Shane awake, but when he instinctively reaches to feel Rachel, the sheets are cold. His heart stutters at the thought that she snuck out in the middle of the night, but then his ears register the sound of Delilah’s snoring from the floor, so he knows Rachel is still here.

Sitting up, he looks over towards her side of the bed and spots her laying on the floor next to Delilah who’s asleep in her doggy bed. Her back is towards him, so he stands up and makes his way around the end of the bed. Rachel has work today too, so he knows she has to get up also.

He takes a knee next to her and slips his hand under her shirt, rubbing along her stomach, “Rach, baby, wake up.”

She gives a small groan, and her hands move to rub at her eyes. 

“What are you doin’ down here? Is Dee okay?” he questions, as he moves his hand to smooth over her hairline. 

A yawn escapes her, before she tiredly opens her eyes, “I couldn’t sleep. Petting her always helps calm me down.”

“Shit,” he breathes, “Because of Rick?”

Just a nod he gets in response. Then almost on cue, they hear movement in the kitchen, obviously Rick moving around. 

“Let me go talk to him, make some coffee.”

“Ok,” she states before letting him take her hand and pull her into a sitting position. Before he stands up, he touches her cheek and kisses her. 

As soon as Shane leaves the room, Rachel stands up.

* * *

After making coffee and pouring a mug for each of them, the two men are still sipping each while standing idly in the kitchen, Rick still musing about what he’s going to do about Lori. 

Movement catches Shane’s eye and he sees Rachel, her bag and purse slung over her shoulder, Delilah’s leash in her hand with Delilah attached to the end, quickly walking past the kitchen. She’s already out of the front door by the time he’s put his coffee down and excusing himself from Rick.

Barefoot, he’s yanking the door open and following her out, “Rach!”

She opens the back door to her car where Delilah knows to hop into, turning to him, “I have to go get ready for work.”

“Yeah, and you usually do that here when you stay over. What are you doing?”

She places her bags on the floor of the backseat and look at him and he finally gets a good look at how exhausted she looks. She really didn’t get any sleep he realizes.

“You asked me to stay last night, so I did. But I can’t be here any longer with him staying here. You have no idea how sick I am over him and Lori thinking that I had something to do with their marriage issues. All night I kept replaying my entire conversation with her and I have no idea where she would have thought I meant anything like what’s happened.”

He steps closer to her, slowly reaching out for her and finally letting himself touch her arms when she doesn’t move to pull away, “Alright, hey. I’ll ask him to stay somewhere else. I don’t want you feelin’ like you can’t be here.”

But the huff she lets out clues him in that his answer wasn’t a good one.

“I am _not_ getting between you and Rick. He needs his friend right now, don’t be another person to kick him out. Shane, it’s fine. I just want to go home.”

His hand shifts to cup her cheek, “Baby, please.”

Rachel ignores him to tiredly add, “I told you that I was worried that your friends wouldn’t like me, remember? I just never thought it would be like this.”

“Hey –“ he starts, but she cuts in.

“I’ll call you later or something, okay?” She quickly says, but just as she turns her head to start getting into her car, Shane cups her cheek and takes a firm grip of her hip, turning her attention back to him. When she looks at him again, he sees the tears in her eyes.

“I didn’t want to cry about this in front of you,” Rachel shares so low that he barely hears her words. He pulls her against him, hugging her to his body, “Well, I don’t want you cryin’ ‘bout this alone.”

It’s just silent tears that fall as she presses her face to his shoulder, returning the hug. 

“Rick is hurting right now and said something he never fuckin’ should have. None of this is your fault,” he tells her again with more finality.

“You don’t actually know that, though,” she weakly argues, pulling back to be able to look at him.

Both his hands come to take a tender hold of her face, his thumbs sweeping away the tears from her cheeks, “I know _you_. You would never have told Lori to do this.”

Rachel goes quiet for a few seconds, then brings her hands to his chest, “I have to go or I’ll be late for work.”

His brows are knitted in concern, he whispers, “I hate you leavin’ like this. I hate that you’re feelin’ like this.”

Her hands hold his forearms and slowly take his hands from her face, “I’ll call you later.”

Despite the statement, Shane feels like she’s pushing him away and he doesn’t know how to stop it without possibly coming across as overbearing. There’s a part of him that’s panicking that once she drives away, he may not see her again. It was when she first said that she’d call him later _or something_. Why add that to it unless she was trying to give herself an out?

“You’re pushin’ me away, Rach,” he decides to say it.

“No, I’m not,” she furrows her brows, freezing her movements to look at him.

“You’re upset and you’re scared because of what Rick said, scared that there may be truth to his words which there isn’t, and instead of stayin’ here and dealin’ with it with me right there by your side, you’re leavin’, tellin’ me that maybe you’ll call me.”

“I never said ‘maybe’,” she tries to be firm, but Shane could always read her too well. 

“You didn’t have to,” he responds with some sadness. 

Embarrassed and unprepared for him to call her out like this, she shakes her head and looks at him, “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You tried to do the same thing that night,” he starts, then gets quieter, “The night we talked about kids.”

The night she bought the pregnancy test and told Shane she was leaving, in the middle of the night, because she didn’t want to have such a heavy conversation with him. But he had convinced her stay. Just like he did with having her stay last night, all because he asked her to. But it can’t always be about what he wants.

“I can’t believe you’re bringing that up because of this,” she motions to the house where Rick’s inside.

“Am I wrong though? You want to run when you get scared, there’s nothing wrong with that. I just wish you’d see me as someone you can handle things with instead of pushing me away to still run from whatever it is.”

“What about how I feel, Shane? What about the fact that I feel like complete shit for being blamed for a wife kicking out her husband, and not just any couple, but Lori and Rick, your best friends? Why should I stay around someone who thinks so little of me when I don’t have to? I _do_ see you as someone I can handle things with, but you also said to me once that you’d never put me in a situation that would end bad, well this seems exactly like such a situation, so do you want me to still stay?”

And when she brings that up, he realizes she has him with that. He did say that to her, when he first asked if she’d be okay with going to dinner with Lori and Rick for the first time. 

Now feeling ashamed that he never thought of it like that, he quietly answers, “No.”

“Thank you,” she answers with a bit of sarcasm as if he just gave her permission to leave.

This time she says nothing else as she gets into her car and backs out of his driveway.

Shane runs his hands down his face with a “Goddamn it!” and Rachel doesn’t let herself cry again until she turns off his street.

They both realize this was it, their first fight.

* * *

With Rick staying with him, the two of them carpooled to work. Which means Shane couldn’t do what he planned to until he dropped Rick back at home and said he was going to Rachel’s for a bit. Still in his uniform, he instead drives to Rick and Lori’s house.

Lori opens the door after hearing the doorbell and there stands Shane, hands on his gun belt, a worried look on his face.

“Rick’s at my place. Can we talk for a minute?” Shane immediately asks.

Lori nods and steps aside to hold the door open for him. She closes it gently behind him and leads him into the kitchen where she offers him a drink, but he declines.

“I figured he’d go to you. I’m sorry that this is involving you,” she feels the need to apologize.

“You know I don’t care about that. But it’s involving Rachel, too, and that’s what I can’t let stand.”

“Rachel? Why?” she couldn’t be more confused.

“You tell me, Lor. She was with me last night when Rick came over and the first thing he does is accuse her of having somethin’ to do with you kickin’ him out. Said how the two of you had lunch the day before and all of a sudden, your usual fighting becomes you kickin’ him out.”

“Oh my god,” Lori places her fingertips at her mouth.

“So, I’m here to find out if he’s right, because I have a woman who is broken up at the fact that she’s been made to think that she may be the reason you two are goin’ through a tough time. She thinks you’re blamin’ her like Rick is. No matter what I say to her, Rick did too much damage with his accusation for me to get through.”

Lori stays quiet as her eyes look away from his to the countertop. 

“Lor? Did she say somethin’? Because I don’t think she did, but I need to hear from you so I have some definitive answer here.”

Lori sighs and looks back to him, “She did…but it’s not what you think.”

* * *

Rachel turned her phone off when she got to work, and she hasn’t turned it back on since. She hated that Shane was right, that she tends to run when things get overwhelming, but she also couldn’t sit around with Rick when he’s the one who put the heavy weight of emotion on her chest. Remembering that she told Shane she’d call him, she just figures she’ll leave her phone off for another hour or so until she’s ready on her own terms to finally talk to him again.

Leaving things kind of heated the way they did is not sitting well with her. It’s just more added stress to the whole situation.

Wiping down her kitchen counter, she hears a couple knocks at her door. Unsure of who might be stopping by right now, she’s cautious as she quietly moves to her door, looking through the peephole.

Opening it, she’s surprised he didn’t use his key, “Babe?”

“Hey baby,” Shane shifts his feet a bit, clearly unsure of the right thing to do, “I, uh, I didn’t want to just walk in after the way we left things this morning.”

Rachel steps aside, and as he walks in, he continues, “And your phone’s been off all day, so I couldn’t really give you a heads up that I was comin’ over,” he bends down a bit to run a hand over Delilah’s head who came to greet him. 

“Yeah, I just needed some time,” she weakly explains, stepping a couple feet closer to him.

Shane gives a few short nods as he straightens up, then looks down at his feet, before looking back up at her, “I just came from talkin’ to Lori.”

And she’s terrified at what he’s about to tell her, “Oh.”

“You did say somethin’ at lunch,” he licks his lips, tilting his head a slight bit.

“Oh my god,” her hands fly to her mouth, “I still don’t understand what I could have said!” she worries.

“I do,” he starts and she’s waiting with bated breath at the answer she’s been waiting for.

Shane’s stare softens and his voice is gentle, “You told her about how much you love me,” tears start to form in his eyes though they never fall, “About how you feel when I walk into a room. And…about how you’ve never doubted for a second that I’m the man you want to spend the rest of your life with…”

As he speaks, Rachel’s hands slowly lower back down to her sides, her eyes becoming glossy with tears as she remembers that part of the conversation with Lori, and how insanely happy she was when she said all those things. 

“…And she said that lately she’s been havin’ trouble rememberin’ the last time she felt like that about Rick.”

A silence falls over the couple as they stay a couple feet apart, staring into each other’s eyes. Then, Rachel wipes at a single tear that falls as she keeps eye contact, “Shane…” she whispers and it’s the only push he needs. 

He moves forward, taking her face in his hands the same time she reaches out and grips the front of his uniform.

“I love you _so_ damn much,” he says desperately, needing her to know right that second.

They both speak hurriedly, wanting nothing more than to apologize for the way they left each other that morning.

“I’m sorry about this morning,” a tear rolling down her cheek. 

“I hate fightin’ with you, disagreein’, whatever that was,” he presses his forehead to hers.

“Me too,” she agrees, then touches the side of his neck when he kisses her forehead.

Rachel continues, “You were right about me running when things get too much. I really do know that I can count on you to handle things with. I won’t do that again, I’m so sorry.”

He shakes his head, “I just hate you leavin’. I want nothin’ more than to be there for you, through everything,” he finally presses his lips to hers. 

The kiss is soft, but takes no time in turning more passionate.

When they do slowly pull away, Shane rubs his thumbs against her cheeks before letting go to instead wrap his arms around her waist. She hugs him with her arms around his neck, holding him tight. He soothes her with one hand rubbing her back as his lips press to her neck, then her temple.

“I’m sorry, too,” he says against her skin, “When you said that you weren’t comfortable because of Rick, I should have listened instead of just makin’ it sound like he was the problem. I shouldn’t have been so selfish in wantin’ you to stay.”

“You’re far from selfish,” she replies, then pulls back from the hug, her hands resting at his chest.

“I’m sorry,” he repeats, quieter, now that he can see her eyes. He runs his hand over her temple, curling his fingers around the back of her head, holding her stare.

“I’m sorry, too,” she says, hands coming to his face. 

Shane gently pulls her forward, lips fitting to hers as he kisses her again. Her lips part as his tongue touches them, deepening their kiss. Her hands slide down to his neck, her thumbs sweeping along his jaw. 

The kiss eventually slows to a few short kisses before he’s pressing one to her nose. 

“What you said to Lori…” he starts, Rachel blushing slightly at the memory, “…Baby, you are my whole heart,” he cups her cheek, a warm smile at his lips. 

Her smile matches his, leaning up to steal another kiss from him. Shane wraps his arms around her, pulling her close as he backs her up against the refrigerator. 

“Take me to bed?” she asks breathless against his lips before tasting them again. 

Shane doesn’t even part from the kiss as he swiftly scoops her up into his arms, carrying her into her bedroom where he nudges the door shut with his foot. 

He places her on the bed before reluctantly pulling away to take off his gun belt.

As Rachel watches his muscles with every movement, she says with a softness, “Thank you. For finding out the truth from Lori.”

She says it just as he’s placing the belt on her dresser. Turning around, he moves back to her, dropping to a knee in front of her. His hands rub along her thighs as he kisses each of her knees, “I couldn’t let another second go by of you blamin’ yourself.”

Rachel gives a weak pull as she takes hold of the collar of his uniform shirt, and Shane smirks as he moves up, letting her ‘pull’ him over her as she lays back on the bed. 

He presses a light kiss to her cheek, “You have a few hours…,” a kiss to her chin, “…for me to show you how much I fuckin’ love you?” another to her cupid’s bow.

“A few _hours_?” she lightly scratches the nape of his neck as her other hand runs along his tight bicep. Her face glows with a playful smirk.

Shane kisses her, “I love you… _a lot_ ,” he winks with a grin, kissing the corner of her mouth. 

She leans up to press her mouth to his, starting to unbutton his uniform shirt as his hand glides down her side.

She giggles against his smile, “Nothing beats when you love me _a lot_ all night.”

**Author's Note:**

> fans of The Office will recognize the dialogue that I borrowed from 'Stress Relief' (5x15) ;)


End file.
